Defeat

What a difference a week makes. At Tay's last game my heart was pounding with excitement, so much I thought it was going to jump right out of my chest. This past Friday though it had sunk right in to my stomach and it felt like it might never go back up. Ponderosa played Legend, a rival school here in town. This was one of those games that the team already had down as a win, but it did not go in their favor. In the beginning we were up 21-0, even with a touchdown being called back on a bogus hold penalty. Then things got ugly, nothing we tried went our way. It seems like every time we ran the ball or threw the ball for any significant yardage, there was a penalty. It came down to the last 2 minutes, Legend had just scored a touchdown. The score was now 21-24, I watched as our boys tried everything to score. I looked at my Mom and said " This can not be happening, we can not loose to this team".  As the clock wound down, I looked at our side line and saw a bunch of distraught boys with their heads down. At the end of the boys was one of Tay's good friends D.J. He had fractured his foot in the last game and was out for the season. This had broken my heart because he would never play football again. But when I saw him this night I lost it. He was slumped over and his body was shaking, he was bawling. A few minutes later Tay came up in the stands, sat down and started sobbing. I was heart broken for these boys who worked so hard and were clearly the better team but now felt complete defeat. I think one of the worst parts of being a parent is feeling helpless. Especially where teenagers are concerned. Band aids have lost their magic and they usually don't want you to talk. Chad and I just sat next to him with our arms around him and let him cry it out. Almost a week later things are still not better and defeat is still in the air. But around me are boys who have grown and I have to remind myself that really thats what it's all about.